But while I only enjoy my china cup from a bookshelf, I love to look at castles and occasionally seek out photos of the royal family.
Yes, I'm one of those.
It's easy to catch a glimpse of them with Internet access. So I'm not sure what fueled my thoughts back when I didn't even own a cell phone. Pictures of Princess Diana covered many magazines in the grocery store check out line which must have been enough to feed my semi-obsession before computers changed the world.
John and Staci Eldridge would say something like... deep inside we long to part of a grand story; to live heroic, royal lives. And that catching a glimpse of a real princess stirs my own inner longing to grasp what it means to be a true child of The King.
Others might say it's sin run a muck.
Regardless, my brother-in-law had insisted I attend a singles beach retreat that Labor Day weekend in 1997, ten months after my husband died. And it didn't take long to realize what a misfit I was amongst the typical single crowd. "What do you?" they asked. "Oh, I'm a mom. My husband just died of a brain tumor so I'm staying close to home with my toddlers."
My transparency stifled more than one conversation.
So by the time we learned Princess Diana had died in a tunnel in Paris chased by paparazzi, I didn't mind huddling away on a balcony staring at the ocean with journal in hand. The song that spilled forth remained filed in my brain for years. And I'm still not sure why, when I decided to roll my piano on the porch last weekend and try a home made video, that I chose that song to record. My boys agreed I might have a chance at becoming an Internet sensation if I posted a bebop tune.
But alas, I recorded the song that at one point I hadn't thought of in years. Christopher Dickey, an award winning author, wrote,
"As I repeated that information live to CNN, my voice broke. Reporting the news of Diana’s death, I remembered my own need to grieve. In the days that followed, I think millions of people shared that experience in various ways: the world seemed to pause to mourn Diana, and in that moment people allowed themselves to mourn for many others they had loved and lost." (The Night Princess Diana Died; World News; 8-31-13)
And for those of you with chronic issues, I rolled my piano onto the porch because it dawned on me recording tunes at home would be an easy, non-stress way to share my music. Performing live just hasn't been realistic lately, so this may be a first, and a new way to keep sharing what stirs in my soul.
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